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Simon 'Furious' Cole:

ADDENDUM: The rant was a little out of date, but Simon wanted to say what he wanted. Power.

I too used to find it odd that people would get other people to update their websites for them, but after I got my friend Elroy to update my site, The Furman Machine for me while I was 'tied up', I realised what tremendous flair a 'guest updater' can do for your site.

I, however, and not that flamboyant, and I since I started spamming internet forums, my writing skills may as well have been flushed down the toilet. I promise you, after reading this rant, that you'll want Chris back so badly, you'll give him sexual.. er.. never mind. Forget i said anything.

At time of writing this rant, the comic you see on this page was a quite well written peice of artisitic humour. Now it's probably nothing more than a joke about and exploding computer and Mark without his pants. Needless to say, it is still captivating, but what it really needs is a good long rant about something to do with it thematically.

Well. I used to be good at rants, but like I said, forums, etc etc etc. Chris asked me to write one tonight (he's probably told you all that i wont last weeks 'competition', hasn't he?) for him, and, damnit, I'm going to do my gosh darn bestest.

Like our friend Mark, in todays comic, I've often been caught in the situation with having a crappy computer... I like to LAN, and damnit, who doesn't ? (shut up, you non-nerdy people). But the problem that lies within lannage, is A) I suck at most computer games, and B) Said games have trouble running on my computer. So, unfortunately for certain game developers, they never received their 5% of what they were entitled to from the sale of their games from me.. I'm just not a very good person. Yes I know I'm comitting an offence. I know I could get fined quite a bit.

But hey, I saw the light. It's called the 'Bargain Bin' at Electronics Boutique. I picked up a copy of "Unreal Tournament Game of the Year Edition" for $20.I went to the counter. The guy who served me OBVIOUSLY played Counter Strike and stuttered as he said "Oh,.. UT, .. . great game this one.. I hope you enjoy it"

And I replied, "I do. I've been playing it for 3 years"

They should sell demos. Demos are what people often anticipate the most. Like at the moment, the OzUnreal community (which I am a part of) is awaiting the release of the UT2003 demo. It's been delayed THAT many times, and now, in the space of 2 weeks, it's been leaked twice. I claim that it's actually Epic's marketting statedgy.. leaking demos themselves, and never releasing a 'full demo' for those of us who dont have the 'net, and instead rely on the front cover of PC PowerPlay for out gaming goodness.

Well I suppose in that way we are paying for demos... But this is only the first step. Soon we'll be seeing boxed copies of demos on the shelves at our local software retailers. Posters will go up advertising the latest tech demo, with one playable character! you wont be able to download demos from GameSpy or GameAreana anymore, you'll have to delve into the twsited brambles of porn links and viagra sites that dwell in the lair of Warez sites. And the demos will need to be cracked to be played... and you'll need a CD key to play them online.

Whats worse is, you'll be able to get the full versions of games as magazine cover mounts. And they'll be smaller in filesize, too.

But I tend to try and steer clear of the future. Quite frankly it scares me. Especially Comercialism, which is resposible for societie's downfall. But with every downfall there is a pick up period - history repeats itself. Hey, that's a good thing. If history repeats itself, then we might have another decade like the 60's.

Maybe then they'll start playing some good music on the radio for a change

Mark:

This is just to pre-empt Friday. By then there should be 2 rants and a photo gallery on AV Connection - the Convention here in Australia that ran 20-21st of July. Don't feel like saying much more. Back in a few days.